I used to believe that if you were alive for the trend the first time, you’re not allowed to participate the second time around.
So even though I called the shortalls-comeback — I told Matthew that it was inevitable that they follow last summer’s crop-top resurgence — I don’t feel like I’m allowed to wear them. Because I already did. At camp. When I was 10.
Also, I swear this outfit is currently available at Topshop/H&M/Zara.
What if you were around for a trend and totally missed it?
Birkenstocks. They’re everywhere. And until Friday evening, I’d never been a fan. When it came to chunky footwear in the ’90s, I opted for silver velcro Guess platforms over the classic leather sandals. Because I was a discerning teenager with impeccable taste.
Sadly, I have no photographic proof the silver shoes ever existed. Nor do I have photos of my silver-eyeliner days.
Boys, I was so cool. Why didn’t any of you want to date me?!
My toe is broken AND Birks are back in a big way. So I gave in and bought my first pair.
For the first time in two weeks, I CAN WALK.
Birks change your life. It’s actually true!
Now for Challenge #2: I’m going to a wedding on Saturday. And I have to wear said Birks if I want to survive the day.
So now not only am I wearing Birkenstocks like a ’90s kid, I’m doing the dress-with-Birks thing, bringing me one step closer to turning into my celebrity doppelgänger:
Probably no socks for me. I have my limits.
And because I needed a dress for this wedding — I realized that I’ve worn all of my dresses to family weddings in the last three years and wanted to wear something a little less “Haven’t I seen that in every other wedding group shot?” — I visited my favourite store ever and splurged on something, um, pretty ridiculous. Frilly cap sleeves! Lace! Bodycon! (I’m typically a ‘What-would-Audrey-wear?’ A-line gal.)
It’s pretty much straight out of 90210. I’m in trouble.
(Fun fact: In Grade 4, someone told me I looked like Tori Spelling, pre-boob-and-nose jobs. “Thank you???”)
Matthew suggested I wear a scrunchie in my hair. I’m worried it will be too much…with the old leather fringe purse I’m planning to resurrect. It’s back to the future!
Off to tease my hair to death… (Kidding. Maybe.)
I own velcro rollers. This is within my hairstyling powers.
The things a busted toe can do to you.